This article was provided by MINES’ friend and colleague, Dr. Sally Spencer-Thomas
Each November, International Survivors of Suicide Loss Day invites people around the world to gather in remembrance and healing. Behind every statistic are families, friends, and colleagues whose lives have been forever changed. Suicide loss is unlike any other kind of grief. It carries a unique mix of shock, guilt, anger, confusion, and stigma, and for many, it becomes a long journey of trying to make sense of the senseless.
In the workplace, where we often spend more waking hours than anywhere else, the ripple effects can run deep. Coworkers may struggle with unanswered questions. Leaders may feel unsure how to respond or what to say. Yet, how an organization shows up in these moments can make a profound difference in how people heal, and in the trust and culture that follow.
The Complexities of Suicide Grief
- It’s both grief and trauma.
Suicide loss often shatters one’s sense of safety and meaning. Survivors may replay events and ask themselves, “Could I have done something?” These looping thoughts can mirror trauma responses and make healing complicated. - It’s nonlinear.
The intensity of grief rises and falls. Anniversaries, reminders, or even workplace discussions about mental health can reopen wounds long after the loss. Recognizing that reactions fluctuate helps set realistic expectations and fosters compassion. - It’s isolating.
Because suicide still feels so daunting, people don’t know how to respond, and many survivors feel silenced or judged. Avoiding the topic—often out of discomfort—can deepen loneliness. Simple, genuine acknowledgment breaks that isolation and signals that support is available.
What to Do If You’re a Coworker or Friend
Be present, not perfect.
You don’t need eloquent words, just empathy. Try: “I’m so sorry this happened. I’m here if you want to talk or sit together.” Ask them to tell you more about their loved one. Say their loved one’s name.
Listen more than you speak.
Grief after suicide isn’t a puzzle to solve. Allow silence, tears, or storytelling without steering the conversation away from pain.
Offer small, steady help.
Loss disrupts focus and energy. A meal, help covering a shift, or negotiating workload can be deeply meaningful, practical support. Ask, “What would support look like to you right now?”
If You’re a Leader or Manager
Lead with compassion and structure.
After a workplace suicide or the death of an employee’s loved one, people look to leadership for guidance. Begin with empathy, communicate clearly, and remind the team of available resources, such as MINES & Associates, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, and community supports.
Find a support group near you: https://afsp.org/find-a-support-group/
Balance honesty with privacy.
Share only confirmed information, avoid speculation, and emphasize collective care. For example:
“We are deeply saddened by this loss. We know many of you are hurting. Please take care of yourselves and reach out for support through MINES & Associates or the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.”
Allow flexibility.
Grief doesn’t conform to timelines. Offer extended leave, modified schedules, or gradual workload transitions.
Support those most impacted.
Supervisors, peers, and crisis responders may experience secondary trauma. Normalize help-seeking and debriefing for them, too.
Healing Together
Suicide grief can challenge everything we believe about connection, safety, and purpose. Yet healing often begins when people feel seen and supported, not as problems to fix, but as humans finding their way through pain.
Encouraging remembrance rituals, sharing stories of hope, and continuing to check in months later all help transform tragedy into a culture of compassion. When workplaces respond with authenticity and empathy, they not only help survivors heal but also strengthen community resilience.
If this topic causes difficult feelings for you, support is available 24/7 through the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (call or text 988) or by reaching out to your MINES & Associates EAP professional for confidential assistance.
International Survivors of Suicide Loss Day
Every year, on the Saturday before Thanksgiving, communities across the globe come together for International Survivors of Suicide Loss Day, organized by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP).
These gatherings, both in person and virtual, create safe spaces for storytelling, remembrance, and connection among those who have lost someone to suicide. Attendees often view a shared documentary, participate in discussions, and leave with resources and renewed hope.
To find or host an event, visit afsp.org/SurvivorDay. Whether you attend as a survivor, supporter, or ally, your presence helps break stigma and fosters healing through community.
To Your Wellbeing,
Dr. Sally Spencer-Thomas
About the Author
Dr. Sally Spencer-Thomas is a suicide loss survivor, having lost her brother Carson to suicide in 2004. A clinical psychologist, speaker, and impact entrepreneur, she has dedicated her career to workplace mental health, suicide prevention, and postvention. She co-chairs the National Guidelines for Workplace Suicide Prevention, leads the Construction Working Minds movement, and is a two-time Suicide Loss Division Director for the American Association of Suicidology.
Dr. Spencer-Thomas is the author of the Manager’s Guidebook to Suicide Postvention and the developer of Navigating the Tsunami After Suicide: A Two-Day Training for Clinicians Delivering an Eight-Session Therapy Model for Complicated Suicide Grief and Trauma, as well as Do No Harm: Ethics & Suicide Care — Considerations When Supporting Suicide Loss, Attempt, and Thought Survivors.
Learn more or access workplace and clinical resources at SallySpencerThomas.com.
